30nJune 2018 Half-Year Review

Half-Year Review

It is hard to believe that the year is half over.  I have enjoyed the challenge of writing an answer to a question a day. So how have done with my goals?

Health wise I am not where I want to be.  I am consistent with my workouts; however, nutrition is not helping.  I make choices each day that either help or not. More times it is not.  Be it from the brownies someone brings to work, or the size of my servings at home for dinner or the type of dinner.  Then there are the weekends where I don’t have a cheat day but a cheat weekend.  All of this is within my power to change.   It has a lot to do with discipline and will power but also what is kept in the house. The temptation is strong if foods that are not helpful on my path are within easy reach.  I have to get buy-in from my wife that we can’t have that stuff in the house.  I know it easy to say just don’t eat them, but my track record is not good on that.  Just keep them away.

During the year I also wanted to instill better habits.  The goal was to choose one a month.  I have done ok but have not had a full 6 new habits ingrained. As an old coach once told me “begin again and again.”  Take full advantage of the final 6 months.  End strong.    Let’s see how that goes. Will report back 31 Dec.

29 June 2018 What About Food?

What About Food?

Growing up in the 60’s we were the guinea pigs for food manufactures. Partially hydrogenated oils and high fructose corn syrup became the main ingredients in a lot of the things we ate. Also, there was heavy advertising that sold things as good for you.  Saturday mornings were cartoon time on tv.  Many commercials were about breakfast cereals and how important it was to start the day with their product.  I remember when Fruit Loops came out. I did not like them but many did.  I was a Frosted Flakes kid.  I like it because “frosted” meant sugar. We were also bombarded with commercials about snacks and sugar drinks: Twinkles, Cup Cakes, candy bars, Coke, etc.  Of course, we wanted them too. 

All of these products had limited nutritional value, but I for one got hooked. I consumed a lot of sugar based stuff and it reflected in my weight.  I was always “the big kid.”  I carried these eating habits a long way into adulthood. I did not like coffee, however, Coke was my caffeine in the morning.  It has only been in last the few years that I have reduced my intake of Coke.  I still really like it but I have it just on Sundays.  The same for the most sugar based products.  It is challenge at work as someone always brings in brownies.  I just have to walk away from them.

I strive to have a different relationship with food.   It is a work in progress.  Changing habits from many decades takes time.   Eating it more slowly, stopping when not overfull are two habits I am trying to ingrain.  

The food manufacturers may have hooked us in as kids, but we need to stop this practice with current generations.  It is not healthy.  Kids need to be put on the right track at a very early age and not buy into the sugar/fat product “drug cartel” that is our food industry. 

28 June 2018 What Reminds You Of Your Mortality?

What Reminds You Of Your Mortality?

I assume most plan to live a long life.  When I was young I was not sure I was going to.  I had friends die in my line of work.  Of course, most of us had the thought that “it won’t happen to me.”  Even with that mindset, I did not follow the rules very well and tested some limits.  However sobering it was to go to funerals of friends, that did not curb the behaviors.

Now that I am in the senior age group, mortality is something to consider. I still plan to live a very long life. I want to break 100 years old.  Of course, quality of life is critical.  It is no use living long if my physical or mental health is impaired.  I believe most parents want to do everything to not be a burden on their children.  

Alzheimer’s is one the cruelest afflictions one can have.  You are not in control.  I would take my life if at all possible before my mind left me.  The challenge is, you don’t know when you will have days of clarity and not.  In those good days, you want to be with family.  

I fully support assisted suicide.  You should be able to decide when you want to die if you are in control of your mental state.  How can anyone say it is wrong?  If you are in constant pain and the only relief is death, then so be it.  Do not make any kind religious reason to me against it. Your beliefs should not in any way prevent me to end my life on my terms. 

I have had a great life so far.  I intend for it to continue for several decades.  However, I also know that death can come at any time.  If it does, well I guess my plan to be 100 years old did not work out. It is just a plan not definitive. That is life.     

27 June 2018 Why Jerusalem?

Why Jerusalem?

One of the cities I have enjoyed seeing is Jerusalem.  However, when I have been there I wonder what it is about that place that attracted people to stay there.  It is in the desert.  It has no river to get water or use for transportation.  It is not on the coast to be used as a port. But here you have a small piece of real estate that for over 3 thousand years has been at the center of conflict.  It is the holiest place for Christians and Jews.  It is the 3^rdholiest place for Muslims.  The Old City of Jerusalem is walled with greater Jerusalem around it.  The walled part is relatively small, about two and half miles around.  The three main religious sites, Western Wall, Church of the Holy Sepulcher and the Dome of the Rock are very close to each other. 

When I stood in the walled city, I couldn’t believe it has been worth the conflict.  But it is not the real estate that is important.  It is the significance people put into the religious history and for that reason have been willing to shed a lot of blood over it. 

Even to this day there is controversy over the city.  President Trump moved the US embassy to Jerusalem.  This has caused challenges with the Islamic world as it recognized the city as the capital of the Jewish nation.  The Palestinians claim that East Jerusalem is their capital.  Each group has just as much claim the other as each has been there for centuries. 

I highly recommend you get to Jerusalem at some point in your life.  It is a fascinating place.  We think of a couple of hundred years as old here and a thousand years in Europe, but in Jerusalem time is much older.  It may not be the most beautiful city from a scenic standpoint but is has an intangible feel that permeates you.  Go there and experience it.       

26 June 2018 Would Your Older Self Be Happy With You?

Would Your Older Self Be Happy With You?

There have been multiple studies that ask senior citizens the regrets they have. Most say they worked too hard and didn’t spend enough time with family.  Another common theme was they didn’t take the risks they should have.  The work one is a challenge because, the person wanted to provide for their family and give them opportunities they may not have had. In order to do that, they had to work hard at the expense of family time.  It is a balance that a lot of people struggle with.

My older self would say that I did not take the risks.  I followed a pretty secure path.  Yes, I did do some things so that my family could have the benefit of them.  However, I never took a risky job or moved to an area to try something new.  I have moved around but have stayed in pretty much the same line of work.

I did make a decision that went against my desire.  I wanted to do a tour in Japan when I was in the Navy, however, my wife at the time had no desire whatsoever in that.  She knew I was going to be gone a lot.  She wanted to be near her family when I was deployed.  I wanted to be selfish and still go, but from a family standpoint it was not best.  That issue was many years ago.

How about today?  Am I living the life my older self would be proud of?  In some ways yes and others no.  I still work in an area that is comfortable, but it is good for my family.  It seems like things are a zero-sum game, someone wins, and someone loses.   I make most of my decisions based on not hurting someone else.  Due to actions on my part in the past, I am ok with that.  I believe my older self would agree.  

25 June 2018 What One Thing Would You Take In A Fire?

What One Thing Would You Take In A Fire?

If your house was on fire and you could only grab one thing, and it can’t be a person or pet, what would you get?  I remember thinking about this a long time ago and the thought came to a box of pictures. They were not reproducible. However, today with most pictures being digital, that is not a problem.  

Most of your important documents should have a digital backup.  However, there are some like a marriage license where the original is important.  I try to have all my important papers in one container that can grab in case of a fire. For the most part I don’t go into the container often, but I know what is in there.  

I believe people should consolidate critical documents into one place that is easy to access.  It is one of those things that you never know when the time will come when you have to grab it.  It also serves the secondary purpose of making it easier for a family member to know where all your accounts reside and such if something happens to you. Most people don’t think of all the accounts and passwords they have that someone has to go through.  

I am in the process of slowly downsizing all of my stuff.  Other than my critical documents box, there is nothing in my house that I have to have.  Yes, there a lot of memories tied up in the stuff, but nothing worth risking my life over to save in a fire.  I will always have the memories; the rest is just stuff. 

24 June 2018 What Question Do You Want To Ask At Work?

What Question Do You Want To Ask At Work?

I think everyone gets frustrated at work every now and then.  We all see things happen and wonder why.  We look to leaders to convey the direction and also explain the reasoning for it.  But when events happen and there is no or limited communication, the staff is left to make judgments on our own.  What question do you want to ask the leaders in your company?

I work in a joint US Air Force/US Navy program office.  It has a mixture of uniformed military personnel, government civilians and contractors (of which I am one).  I have had the experience of being in all three positions, so my perspective is a little broader than most. 

The question I want to ask is why the leaders don’t be bolder in their decisions. If anything, they are in a great place to do it.  It is extremely rare for any military or civil servant to get fired.  It has to be some criminal act for that happen.  I don’t understand the timidity.  They will take a long time to make decisions, during which a lot of money is wasted.  The contractual process is byzantine at best.  It is so convoluted and does nothing to accelerate or improve things. We hear all the time about acquisition reform and doing things smarter.  I don’t see it.  Very few leaders want to make any waves.  The military guys don’t want to endanger getting promoted.  The civil servants are risk averse by nature.  

That is the question I would pose at work.  We spend a lot of time and money talking reform and best business practices, but don’t do it.  We need leaders who will step up and really lead.

23 June 2018 Why Don't You Run For Office?

Why Don’t You Run For Office?

I often ask myself why I don’t run for political office. For me that would be for Congressman.   I have no problem criticizing current politicians but what is stopping me for trying? One of the challenges is the two-party system we have. It effectively prevents on independent from running. That is the only way I would want to run, as an independent.

That might sound like an easy excuse. Here are just a couple of the barriers, in Florida you have to put up $10,000 to even have your name on the ballot. Some states have a nominal fee that is nowhere near this. They want you to raise money through one of the two parties. Raising money has its own legal challenges. You have to keep detailed records of who and how much were given to you. If you are tied to one of the parties, you have to agree to the platform. There are too many issues where I would be in conflict with either party.

In the last National primaries there were multiple Republican candidates who ran for the vacant congressional seat. There was one candidate who would’ve been an outstanding representative for our district. But he did not have the support of the party. The party preferred to go with a guy who was the representative in the Florida legislature.  It didn’t matter who was the better candidate, it was just who had the connections. 

I still think long and hard about trying. I know it is very easy to criticize but difficult to actually get in the ring and compete. This is one of the biggest things I struggle with especially if I don’t try it and I’m on my deathbed and I’m thinking about regrets.

22 June 2018 Do I Really Need Stuff?

Do I Really Need Stuff?

I was a prized consumer. I bought a lot of stuff even when I couldn’t afford it. I took as a need when it fact it was only a want.  I am not sure where this thinking came from.  My parents knew what it was to be poor and took care not to waste money.  

I had a spend thrift attitude for as long as I can remember.  Cars, house improvements, stereo equipment and such were constant expenditures.  Looking back on it, my life would not have not been any less rewarding if I had practiced fiscal discipline.   In fact, just the opposite is true, I would have had greater opportunities. 

One of my most imprudent purchases was a very expensive stereo set.  I received a bonus from work and I went right out spent many thousands of dollars.  Now, I like my music loud and I liked the quality of it too.  I got in my head that I just had to have the top of the line stuff.  Was the quality that much better, probably not. Could I have played it just as loud with a cheaper system, very much so.  

I still today think about things I want.  One of processes I have in place is to wait a day to see if I still have the same drive to get something.  I am actively removing stuff from my possession.  I may not get to the level of a minimalist, but I am working toward it. I have come to really understand what is important and it is not stuff.  It is a challenge, but one I know I will succeed at.

21 June 2018 What Have I Put Off?

What Have I Put Off?

For a long time, I said I was going to get in touch with old friends.  Not just through Facebook either.  I was going to try and see at least one old friend every 6 months.  I can’t make any excuses why I have not done it.  I guess I didn’t make it a priority.  

It took me almost 25 years to go from undergraduate to graduate school.  I said I was going to learn a foreign language, still haven’t started that.  I was going to get a math degree or at least teach myself higher level math.  I have the material, just haven’t made the time. I purchased a year subscription to the Great Courses.  Still waiting to start one.  I made a bucket list a few years ago, have only scratched off one.  

As you can see, I have intensions but don’t put in the time.  I listen to a lot of podcasts and audio books as well as hardcopy books.  I have 3 magazines I read cover to cover.  It is not like I waste time in front of the tv.  

I do have a hard time defining what I really want to do.  Is the bucket list really important?  So far, I would say no.  Getting smarter through online courses, not yet.  

 I spent a good bit of money setting up a couple of websites that I thought I wanted, but I let both go away.   The initial enthusiasm was there but not the day in and day out execution.   

I have been consistent with my blog.  It is a challenge I want to complete.  It will be the one project I took from concept to the initial goal.  I am almost halfway through with it.  Once I am done I will be able to say to myself I didn’t put that off.  It should give me the push to start and finish other goals.  Will see how that turns out.

20 June 2018 Why No Dissent?

Why No Dissent?

I find it troubling that no Republican in Congress is willing to say anything bad about President Trump.  Senator Corker from Tennessee has somewhat, but he is retiring.  Is your job that important to you that you are willing to sell your soul to stay elected?  Why has blind allegiance, or loyalty as Trump would say, take precedence over what you believe?  Many reporters state that Republicans are willing to say negative things, but only off the record.  

I can’t think of a situation where I would stay silent if one of my supervisors or someone in my company outright lied or said things that so damage the country. Nobody agrees 100% with anybody in Congress or the Presidency.  Why is even the slightest negative statement met with outrage by the President? Congressman Mark Sanford from South Carolina was one of the most conservative members of Congress.  He said some mild things that Trump thought were disrespectful. Trump tweeted before the South Carolina primaries that Sanford should be defeated, and he was.  This proves the President wants blind loyalty. If a staunch conservative gets a rebuke, the party is in trouble.

Dissent is a major tenant of our form of government.  It is expected that politicians will disagree but also find a way to compromise in order for legislation to pass.  As I wrote before, Trump want to be a dictator or monarch. Everyone under him, and he feels Congress is under him, must do his bidding.  Is this what we want as a country?  

I wrote harshly about Congress and this is one of the reasons why.  If you don’t say what you believe because you are afraid of the President, then you have no business being in Congress. Trump has flaws, major ones.  It is ok and required to disagree with him when he says or does things that are opposite to what you believe.   Show a spine and do so.  

19 June 2018 What Are You Willing To Endure?

What Are You Willing To Endure?

If you have a goal, what are you willing to endure to achieve it.  This is the crux of how much you want something. There is a famous experiment done with kids in the late 1960’s.  The kid was given the choice to eat one cookie now or wait 15 minutes and get two cookies.  The videos are kinda funny to see just how hard it is for them to resist eating the 1^stcookie.  Most could not endure the wait.

For adults this is true too.  Most would rather have short term gratification vice waiting.  Credit card debt is a perfect example of this.  It is so easy to just charge it now vice save up the money and pay for it with no debt incurred.  

I have had a couple of goals that took time.  In my senior year of high school, I knew I was going to go to college and then join the service to fly.  That goal took 8 years to fully realize (getting my pilot wings in the US Navy).  There were twists and turns along the way, but I was going to achieve it.  

Today, my goal is to set a day when I can retire from full time work.  I think I will always work in some capacity, but I want to transition to part time.   I would like to continue in my present line of work as a part time employee.  I think 2-3 days a week would be a good pace.  Maybe start at 3 and work towards two.  Right now, this goal is in the 10+ year time frame. Buying a house later in life forces some compromises.  I have to pay off the house if I want to reduce my work days.  That involves some trade-offs.  I have to decide what am I willing to forgo today in order to have a semi-retired life down the road.  It is the challenge of living for today or retiring at some point.  What am I willing to endure?

18 June 2018 What Book Most Impacted You For Work?

What Book Most Impacted You For Work?

I have read a lot of books about business, dealing with people, the challenges of leading, etc.  The book that has had the most impact on me is “Extreme Ownership” by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin.   They are ex-Navy Seals who took their combat experiences and used them to explain how businesses can improve.  They have built a thriving consulting business.  

The premise of the book is leaders take ownership for everything.  They don’t blame the team for any failures.  Now at first thought you may think there is no way that a leader as an individual can be responsible for all that happens in a business.  That is the point, most people do not take responsibility and place the blame on any number of excuses.  A key quote, “a good leader has nothing to prove but everything to prove.”

The book is pretty blunt but does a great job of explaining a combat situation they encountered and then relate it to an issue at one of businesses they consulted with.   A leaders ego can be the biggest asset or liability in a company.   They define a leader as either effective or ineffective.  The only true measure of a leader is did the team succeed or not.  

I highly recommend this book.  Anyone can gain insights that can be applied to a large business as well as the one-person operation.  It is also very valuable for one’s personal life too.   Read it!   

17 June 2018 What Challenges You?

What Challenges You?

Most of my challenges are internal.  My work life has been pretty stable and should continue to be.  That is not to say that I should not be prepared for something unexpected.  Nothing is for certain at work, however, all indications are that it will continue as is for the time being.  How I can prepare myself for the unexpected is to be in a position financially to handle it.

For the most part, my challenges are due to the choices I made.  Or more importantly, the consequences of those choices. If my situation is due to my actions, then any change in that would come from me.  

I have mentioned before that one of my main goals is to get in the best shape physically.  I have not helped myself in this area.  However, I am in a position to be able to change it.  I have always felt that if I keep a consistent workout routine that my health will be good.  I was wrong, or at least I let myself believe it.  Nutrition is the key over working out.  It is a daily challenge to make good choices.  If bad food items are in the house, it is hard to resist them.  It should be easy to fix that, just don’t have them in the house.  That is true if I lived by myself, but, the other members of my family don’t share the same thoughts as I do.  They want to enjoy the “bad” foods.  That is ok, they shouldn’t have to live by my desires.  I just have to work each day on my self-control.  That is easier said than done.  But in the end, it is my choice if I do eat what I shouldn’t.  I can’t make any excuse that the lack of my self-control should be blamed on anyone else. Yes, it would be easier if the stuff was not in the house.  But, who said it should be easy? 

This is the challenge I work at each day.  I wake up each morning determined to make good choices and every night I look in the mirror and ask myself if I did.  I can’t look weeks or months down the road for some result. It is just the day in and day out decisions that will slowly led me to my goal.   

16 June 2018 Why The Love Of Dictators?

Why The Love Of Dictators?

President Trump goes out of his way to praise dictators but insults our allies who are democratically elected.  Why is that? For one, he thinks dictators are strong because they can rule with impunity.  That is how he wants to lead.  Each dictator he likes, Putin from Russia, Erdogan of Turkey, and now Jun from Korea are ruthless and have imprisoned and even killed opposition candidates.  But Trump equates dictatorial strength with great leadership.  Those two are not the same.  On the other hand, he views elected politicians from our allies as weak.  

The greatest insult to Trump would be for him to be portraited as weak.  Weak as a leader but particularly as physically weak.  He is a coward and a bully so I can see where anything said of weakness would upset him. The dictators he likes are bullies too. The allied leaders are not bullies, they are smart and sophisticated.  Trump sees that as weak.

Trump does not like the democratic system we have. He thinks it gets in his way of doing what he wants.  He ran his business his way without anyone telling him what to do.  Why can’t he run the country the same way?  The historical reasons why the founding fathers set up the system we have is lost on him.  We did not want the President to be a monarch.  We did not want a king.  Trumps wants to be a king.  Dictators are “kings.”  

We as a country have to ensure our elected members of Congress be the check and balance on the President as intended in the Constitution.  The President is who he is.  Someone who loves and envies dictators.  The press and Congress need to let him know, even if it is daily, that we as a country do not like or tolerate dictators.  If we don’t, he will continue to try to be one. 

15 June 2018 Do You Keep A Journal?

Do You Keep A Journal?

Keeping a journal has been a challenge for me.  I have one, but I never seem to write much.  I would only write a sentence or two about the day.  I know it takes time and practice, but I have been at it for 8 years.  There is a practice called Morning Pages.  You write 3 pages just stream of consciousness.  Whatever comes into your mind you just write it.  I did this for a few weeks.  Nobody would have been able to decipher it.  Penmanship is something I really lack.  Has been that way since elementary school.

If you were to read my journals you would find a consistent, I would say failing, theme.  Over and over again I would write how I am going to get in better shape, both physically and financially.  Month in and month out you can read it.  But progress, well that is another story.  

I have been reluctant to write my deepest thoughts lest someone was to read it. There are things I am not ready to write about.  Or at least have the chance of anyone else reading it.   

But isn’t that the purpose of a journal?  Where you can write your most intimate thoughts as well as mundane stuff.  It is a chronical of your life, so you can use it a reminder in the future.  As much as I think I will remember stuff, I won’t. 

I will continue to work on my journal.  If I want the benefit of it, I have to make it a daily part of my life. Let’s see where it takes me. 

14 June 2018 What Is Right About The Federal Government?

What Is Right About The Federal Government?

 

Congress and the Federal government consistently rate as terrible in public polling.  Rarely do we see positive stories about it.  For the most part, there is very little positive to say about it.  The bureaucracy of the Federal government is beyond comprehension.  Once brought in as a civil servant, it all but impossible to fire someone.  A 1.0 GPA is an acceptable work standard for civil servants.  As long as the person just barely does their job, you can’t fire them.  So, from a personnel standpoint, there is nothing positive to the tax payer about the current system.

 

Congress barely polls into double digits for being a respected organization.  It is the rigid rules set in place to keep seniority as the primary factor in the job they have. Congress makes the law that says airline pilots have to retire at 65.  But they can stay in no matter how old they get.  If you watched the Mark Zuckerberg testimony before Congress you got a great example of why that institution should have a mandatory retirement age.  The utter incompetency of the questions by most the panel demonstrated just how uninformed they are.  It was beyond embarrassing to see just how stupid some members are.  Stupid is not an exaggeration.  If you don’t know the technology you have oversight on, then don’t be on that committee.  How can you possibly make laws if you are ignorant of the technology?

 

So, what is right about the Federal government?   Hmmmm….give me a second……wait, I might have something……. Nope not that…..o come on, there has to be something…….I am really trying…….

 

I know there is some good the Congress does, I just can’t think of something.  If you ask people if they want Congress to have term limits the vast majority say yes.  If you ask them if we should get rid of their Congressman or Senator most say no, they like their person.  But they want people in other districts to get rid of the their members of Congress.  So you can see why we keep getting the same old people in Congress, some for decades. 

 

We need changes to Congress and the Federal government.  Until the majority makes that happen we are stuck with who are there and that is not good for the country.        

13 June 2018 What Potential Candidates Intrigue You?

What Potential Candidates Intrigue You?

 

Even though the Presidential election is two and half years away, by next summer things will be gearing up for it.  Who is out there that I may support.  As I am an independent I don’t hold any loyalty to any party.  I would love to see a candidate who could run as an independent and not be beholden to either party.  However, I am a realist and a person with vast personal wealth could do it.  Michael Bloomberg or Mark Cuban could if they so desired.  I also believe each could be successful at it.  I would support either one if they decided to.  I could also support either one if they decided to go with either party.

 

You may ask, why Mark Cuban?  Should someone have prior political experience?  I don’t believe that.  I want attitude and aptitude.  I want a leader, but also someone who can compromise in order to get legislation passed.  I feel he has those qualities.

 

I would be happy to support Nikki Haley should she decide to run.  Senator Mark Warner, a Democrat from Virginia, is another person I could support.    Democratic Congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard is someone I am looking at who will be a major political force in the future.  I do not agree with all her positions, but I feel she has the characteristics I stated above.  A Warner/Gabbard ticket would be very formidable.  I would enthusiastically support them over Trump/Pence.

  

If Trump is still around and runs in 2020, any combination of Bloomberg, Halley or Cuban on the Republican ticket would beat the Trump/Pence ticket in the primaries.

 

These are the people I hope run for the President and/or Vice President in 2020.     

 

12 June 2018 Is He Above The Law?

Is He Above The Law?

 

President Trump claims he can pardon himself and can’t be indicted.  Does he have an argument that can be supported?   The Constitution is pretty clear on the first one, it says in Article 2 Section 2….”and he shall have Power to grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offences against the United States, except in Cases of Impeachment.”  So if he is impeached, he can’t pardon himself from that.  As to the second argument, Article 2 Section 4 says…”The President, Vice President and all civil Officers of the United States, shall be removed from Office on Impeachment for, and Conviction of, Treason, Bribery, or other high Crimes and Misdemeanors.”  So, even if he pardons himself for the conviction, he will still be impeached for it and he can’t pardon the impeachment.

 

Why would we want a President who even thinks he has this power?  I certainly don’t. A foundation belief in our democracy is that no one is above the law.  We are not a monarchy or a dictatorship.  Of course, the President loves dictators.  I mean he really respects them because they get to do what they want and are not bound by any group like Congress or the Courts to get in the way.  Think about that for a moment.  Our President thinks you are weak if you follow the rule of law and have other institutions that hold you accountable.  But if you rule without any checks and balances and you kill opposition candidates, then you are a great leader.

 

I used to want my President to do well, every President.  However, this draft dodging coward cannot be impeached soon enough.  I usually respect other people who have different political views than mine but if you like Trump, that means you condone everything he has done.  For that I can’t respect you.  I don’t even feel sorry for because you are too stupid to understand how badly he is damaging this country.   That may be harsh, but it is how I feel. 

 

The President is not above the law, and he will soon find that out.

11 June 2018 What Do You Get Angry About That Is Insignificant?

What Do You Get Angry About That Is Insignificant?

I used to spend a lot of time getting angry in traffic.  Not at a road rage level, but enough to build up negative energy inside.  Did it ever make traffic better, not once.  Did it make me feel better getting angry, no it didn’t.  Was there any positive from it, no.  I know it added tension in the car when I was with family.  If there was any self-talk I could have said to myself, it would have been “this too shall pass.”  I am not completely “cured” of getting mad in traffic.  I would call it more annoyed than mad.  I work at it every day, some days are just better than others.  

Far too often I have let little things create emotions that have no value. This in turn made me give off a negative appearance which just brought down whoever I was with.  I could not get it in my mind that it not worth it to get upset over things I have no control over.  If someone’s child is crying or yelling on a plane, it does no good to get mad at the parent.  I am sure they do not want their child crying.  It was not their goal to have their child heard over a large part of the plane. It did not help the situation to give the parent a stare that meant to say “can’t you take control of your child?” It did not help me to get upset about it.  Did that help get the child to stop crying, no.  As much as it is inconvenient to have a child crying on a plane, and that is all it is, inconvenient.  It might even help to smile at the parent and understand they are having a tough time and are not enjoying the flight.

I work every day on keeping a positive attitude and not letting negative emotions build up over insignificant things.  I know it is much better for me and certainly much better for those around me.

10 June 2018 How Have You Handled A Difficult Boss?

How Have You Handled A Difficult Boss?

I suspect everyone at one time or another has had to work for a boss who was difficult.  Most of the time your only option may be to leave.  However, that was not an option when I was in the military.  The thing that made it bearable was his time was only going to be a year or two.  Either he was going to rotate out or you were.   Hopefully, your career was not impacted by it.  One bad evaluation from someone you did not get along with can derail your plan.

There are also times in your career when confronting a bad boss could be challenging.  If you are just entering the workforce, it can be very hard for a young employee to speak up.  The best course of action will be to confide in someone you trust.  Trust is vital here because you want to discuss something that is impacting your work and you do not want to come off as whining.  You want to understand how to work better with this boss.  You may just need to know their way of managing.  If you don’t get the answers you want or feel your boss and you are just on different wavelengths, you might want to consider changing jobs.  It is no fun at all coming to work with a boss you don’t get along with.  It is not worth it.

There are bosses who might respect you to come forward and discuss things that are bothering you.  Now you have to be very diplomatic and not come off as accusatory.  You have to be somewhat unemotional and discuss specifics to see if it just a misunderstanding.  If your boss has any integrity, they will be open with you and not condescending.  

There will always be challenging people to work with, some may be co-workers and other may be your boss.  Have an open dialogue plan with all your bosses.  Get to know their quirks and expectations.  An early conversation can go a long way to defuse a situation that could turn negative.   Just don’t stay silent and let a boss make your life miserable.  Move on and find a place better suited for you. 

9 June 2018 What Behavior Have You Changed?

What Behavior Have You Changed?

I have done a lot of things impulsively.  I never thought about the consequences.  If I had just waited a day I might have saved myself a lot of challenges. Cars have been one of my most impulsive purchases.  Kept my first car, a 4 year old Datsun 280Z all of a few months because I got it in my head that it was going to break down.  Not that it sounded like it, just in my mind it was.  I thought I loved that car, but no.  Traded it for a Chevy Vega.  Now there is a great deal, have a larger car payment now when nothing was wrong with the first one.  I kept the Vega a couple of years and then driving home one day from work I came to a stop light.  I looked over at the Nissan dealer and thought, why not?  Went in, looked at a new 300Z and bought it, didn’t even test drive it. I loved that car.  I kept it 6 months and then traded it in for a Ford Escort.  Needed a lower monthly payment to pay for future marriage expenses. Do you see a pattern, sports car then small car for a perceived future event?   Had the Escort a few years then out of the blue bought a Chevy IROC Z.  That was a fun car, kept it nine months.  For a while I drove my wife’s Mazda because I got her a Ford Explorer.  We had some stability in cars for a long time.  Then one day I decided she needed a new Ford Explorer.  I drove to the dealer, saw one I liked and bought it.  Didn’t test drive it, was there maybe 30 minutes.  I did give it to her and got her old Explorer.  

The old Explorer lasted a long time, but I wanted something different, so I bought a 3 year old BMW 525.  I liked that cat a lot.  Managed to hold on to it for 3 years.  Traded it in for a Honda Accord.  

It has taken a few decades, but I am keeping that Accord until the wheels fall off. I have owned it for 7 years, the longest of any car that I just drive.  It is a very reliable car.  

Do I have other behaviors I had to change, of course.  If you thought I went through cars, you should hear my history with houses. 

8 June 2018 What Creative Things Do You Want To Do?

What Creative Things Do You Want To Do?

 I have always had the self-talk that I am not a creative person.  I have stayed away from trying to do creative things because I felt it futile.  I know creativity covers a lot of areas.  To me it was art, poetry and music.  It was why start because I suck at it.  Now, did I ever give it a real chance…no.  I made all kinds of excuses.  Would I like to be involved in any ones of those, yes.  I felt like I had to have some ability.  It certainly wasn’t the “handyman” stuff around the house.  I don’t have any “creativity” in that area either. So, what is it?

I would watch my brother be able to play the guitar, fix a car, do electrical and carpentry things.  How did he get those skills?  He did these as a teenager.  I thought how unfair that was.   It seemed like they just came to him naturally.  

I have started writing to try and build my skills.  It is a long slow road.  Sometimes the words come freely and other times it is a struggle.  I dabble every now and then in poetry.  It focuses me on every word to not only get the rhyming pattern correct but also the flow of each sentence.  

The hardest part for me was getting over myself and just starting to write. It doesn’t matter if I plan to have anyone see it or not.  Putting in the time is all that matters.  Do I have any plans for a book?  I don’t know.  I just want to write and see where it goes.  

Next, I want to add drums or piano to my creativity wish list.  

7 Jun 2018 Do You Open Up To Anyone?

Do You Open Up To Anyone?

 I have always been a very private person.  I never wanted to open up and tell anyone what my feelings and thoughts were that I held so close.  I am not sure if it was a fear of being judged or laughed at or whatever.  I just thought I couldn’t let anyone in because I would get hurt.  Now I would do this to “protect” myself but I hurt plenty of other people.  

You would think that a spouse would be that person you could and should be fully open with.  You choose to spend a life with someone and still not confide in them.  I may have had some misguided thinking that if I did open up before we were married then they would not to be with me.  I also know it is unfair to them if I am not completely open.  Your spouse has to know what you think.  How can they help if they don’t know?

There may also be a friend or two who you confide in.  I doubt it would be on the same level as a spouse.  Or can it be?  I am not sure on that.  A spouse should be the one held closest and be the most trusted. 

Is there any positive about keeping things inside?  I doubt it.   But I also know how challenging it is to open up after being intensely private for so long.  It is a daily work in progress for me.  If I want a true relationship with anyone I want to be close to, I need to be open with them.  I can’t expect them to be open to me and not reciprocate.  

The door creeks open a little more…..heart rate goes up…..it will be ok. 

6 June 2018 Do We Want To Lead?

Do We Want To Lead?

As a country we need to decide if we want to lead and thus help direct world events or do we want to pull back and only act when forced too? This a critical issue that has a large impact in how countries deal with us, how much we budget for foreign activities and how our trade policies are formed.  

It is very easy to throw around catchy phrases like “America First,” however it is not that simple.  We cannot stand alone in the world.  Our economy is so intertwined with the rest of the world that we couldn’t even if we tried. Now we can lead and actively advance policies and investments that help America, but they also have to benefit the other trading partners.  Gone are the days when we can exploit another countries resources with little benefit to them, and that is a very good thing.  We should want and strive to have equitable agreements.  It does not a have to be a zero sum game were one side wins and the other loses.

Though we still have the largest economy in the world that is changing fast.  China and India are growing and in the coming decades will have larger economies. 

We have to lead if we want to be thought of as a partner.  There may be some hard truths that have to be told to certain industries that we cannot go back to the “good old days.”  Until we find a way to make coal have a much lesser impact on the environment, that industry is going to decline.  Technology has rendered a vast number of steel jobs obsolete.  The steel companies are not going to employ the numbers they did in the 1980’s and earlier. 

We can’t protect those jobs in those industries with tariffs. That just leads to other countries putting tariffs on our goods from other businesses.  That is zero sum game mentality.

We need to defend our companies from unfair trade practices in other countries. China can’t have open business here and we not there.  But you only get fair trade with being a fair trading partner.  You can only make global trade policies by leading the effort. Saying “America First” at all cost will only cost us. It will not have any benefit.        

5 Jun 2018 Who Decides What Is Offensive Speech?

Who Decides What Is Offensive Speech?

Roseann Barr was terminated for her tweet.  The challenge is, who decides when something is said raises to level that the person should lose their job?  If a comedian degrades another person, like at the White House Correspondents Dinner, should that person have lost her job?  

The standard for something offensive at my work has been defined as not what I think if I said something but what the person who heard it thought.  I might tell a joke that I thought was harmless, but if someone found it offensive I could get fired.  

So what is the standard?  If Sarah Huckabee Sanders found Michele Wolfe’s jokes offensive, should Michele be fired and not be allowed to perform again?  If a rapper has misogynistic lyrics that are offensive to women, should he be let go by his recording company?  Should a radio station lose their FCC license for playing offensive music? 

In no way do I agree with what Roseanne Barr texted.  She has the free speech to that say it, but she also should have understood that there are consequences for that speech.    

I just want to know where the line is.  Is it a moving target?  If a man said the same “jokes” about Sarah Huckabee Sanders, would the condemnation been harsher? 

I think stupidity is offensive.  Should I be able to file a grievance against someone at work who I find stupid?  I know that sounds outrageous but that is the times we live in.  Somebody somewhere is offended by something someone else said.  

As I said, there are consequences for free speech.  I just want the condemnation to be equally enforced.