Do You Express Your Feelings?
When growing up, the idea of being a man was keeping your emotions inside. The “stoic” man. If you were to study and understand stoicism you would know that not showing emotion is not a main tenant. A lot of challenges can occur when you don’t express your feelings. People can’t read your mind. Yes, your body language can show what your feel, but until you say the words, someone is still guessing.
How can you have a relationship if you keep frustrations and anger inside? Most are willing to show “positive” or happy emotions. There is emotional damage to a relationship as well as physical damage to you if you don’t express it. When you keep negative inside it causes stress which over time can lead to medical challenges.
You don’t need to go off on someone if you are angry, especially if it is your partner or children. However, you do need to get the emotions out. If that means going off where no one can hear so you can scream that is ok. You get the initial “rage” out before you engage in conversation. Even after you get it out, you still need to have the talk in order for the other person to know what you feel and why you feel it.
You may think you are doing someone a favor by not talking to them when angry, but you are helping neither of you. Be an adult, go scream somewhere if you have too, but then go talk to the other person. That is what we need to convey and not some outdated “real man” persona.
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