28 Jan 2018 Why Was I Judgmental

Why Was I Judgmental?

One part of my life that I’m working on is not being judgmental.   I was always quick to say something negative about someone when I perceived some flaw in him or her.   What I’ve come to understand is that I didn’t know their story.

Everyone has a story that got them to where they are today. I’ve come to realize that I was just projecting insecurities I had onto others.

Who was I to judge anyone else? I have more than enough skeletons in my closet.

Did it give me some smug satisfaction to judge someone else?   It must have.   Did give me anything positive in my life? Absolutely not.

In fact, it put a barrier between me and that person. I did not take the time to hear their story. That person may have been someone who could have had a positive impact on my life, but I did not give them a chance.

Often my judgmental comments would be in some humorous vein, or what I thought was humorous.   If that person was to hear it, they might not think it funny.  It could have hurt them.

I strive to understand someone, to hear their story and then not judge.

How many times when growing up did I hear “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”   How very true those words are.   I would’ve been a much better person if I had just followed them.

Am I judgment free, well, not completely.  The President and other politicians have made it very challenging on this.  I work at being an informed person, however, the words I hear from them bring out strong emotions in me. Let’s just call those people work in progress.

At my work and my direct interactions with people, I strive every day to live up to the say only nice things.  I have become very aware when I hear others say negative things.  I walk away or try to redirect the conversation. I do not support or add to a discussion like that.

I have to make behavioral change a habit. That is each day I have to assess how well I did in not being negative towards someone.  

I have to say it feels so good to not say certain things. It is all part of being a better person.